GETTING PAST THE “WHAT IFS’

Some of the biggest battles I have ever fought never happened. I have spent too much time and energy in my lifetime focused on “What if?” scenarios that never materialized: • What if (you name it) happens? • What if (fill in the blank) doesn’t happen? I can conjure up worst-case scenarios at a moment’s notice. Can you relate? Our “What if?” questions are usually followed by “What will I do?” questions. The end result is anxiety over things that are out of our control. It is as productive as a dog chasing its tail. When I resumed my career as a social worker in 1988, after a time-out to raise my family, I argued with my soon-to-be supervisor Betty about her decision to hire me. I was afraid she was offering me the position because she knew me outside the...